The Power of Forgiveness

Forgiving someone who has hurt you is important for good mental health. When someone you love hurts you one of the best things you can do for yourself is harness the power of forgiveness. No one is immune to being hurt. Whether it is a coworker who took credit for your work, a friend who slighted you, or a spouse who cheated on you – we have all suffered from behavior from another that hurt us. These hurts can leave you feeling resentful and angry. You may have a strong desire for revenge. Even if you never act on those thoughts of revenge you may find you spend a lot of time daydreaming about getting back at the person who hurt you.

What is Forgiveness?

Forgiveness is the act of letting go of the resentment, negative thoughts and desire for revenge that many people feel when they have suffered a betrayal. Forgiveness is actively working to let go of these negative thoughts and feelings and instead focus on more positive things.

Forgiveness does not mean you have absolved the person who hurt you from any guilt. They are still, and always will be, responsible for their own behavior, you are just choosing to not be hurt going forward.

Benefits of Forgiveness

Forgiving someone can be an incredibly powerful act. Many people who have forgiven even the worst behaviors describe a sense of peace, a calmness about them that they hadn’t been able to achieve before they forgave the person who hurt them. What doctors at the Mayo Clinic have found is that forgiveness can lead to:

• Healthier relationships
• Greater spiritual and psychological well-being
• Less anxiety, stress and hostility
• Lower blood pressure
• Fewer symptoms of depression
• Stronger immune system
• Improved heart health
• Higher self-esteem

By letting go of resentments, grudges and following a path of forgiveness you are refusing to define who you are by how you have been hurt. You are refusing to live the life of a victim and instead are choosing a path with much fewer obstacles in your way. Forgiveness isn’t always easy, sometimes it’s going to take everything you have to move past the hurt and anger you feel for someone. However, the rewards of allowing yourself to forgive outweigh any benefits there might be to languishing in anger.