Creating Success in Love

Ah, February, the month for lovers of all kinds. Those who are looking for love, those who are in love and those who want to rekindle their love.

Love is one of the most powerful emotions and yet many of us have no idea how to find success in love.

Certainly meeting the right person is a good portion of the task, and one we won’t be focusing on here, but once you’ve found your love how to you keep it? Staying in love is harder than finding love but there are things you can do to keep the odds of a successful relationship in your favor. Here are five things you can do right now to create lasting love.

1. Listen

Simple enough but many of us stop listening to our lover when the excitement begins to fade. We’ve developed a routine and for the most part stick to it unless some outside force comes along and jolts us out of it. Make an effort to listen to your significant other when they tell you about their day (and don’t forget to ask about their day first). You don’t need to solve any of their problems, you just need to listen. Don’t forget that listening goes both ways.

2. Compromise

It takes two to tango and if you’re not giving your share that means your partner is getting less and probably growing resentful of you… a sure sign that love is not successful. Compromising in love doesn’t mean giving in it means seeing things from his or her perspective. The scales won’t always be perfectly balanced but you should aim for the ebb and flow to be about equal for each person.

3. Forgive

Another two way street. I knew a couple who fought all the time but never actually made up. No one ever apologized and so there was no place for forgiveness — just resentment and contempt. Because they never made up, the argument just faded away, they were easy to fight at the drop of a hat because there was so much built up resentment. Offer forgiveness and seek it, too. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you’re conceding or forfeiting your position. It means you care enough about the relationship to move on, hopefully with more knowledge, and love more.

4. Be There

When bad things happen it’s nice to have someone to lean on. If you’re in a relationship be present for your significant other even if you aren’t sure of the role you should be playing. When hard times strike stand next to your honey and help hold them up. It might be the difference between getting through he storm and crumbling from life’s blows.

5. Say I Love You

It may seem obvious but many couples stop saying these magic words. Actions speak louder than words, and by all means show your love whenever the mood strikes (and even when it doesn’t), but telling your partner how much they mean to you can have a powerful impact. These three words let your partner know you care, they are cherished and that they are special. Who doesn’t want more of that?